(Page 2 of 365) Who am I?

I was in a very serious relationship for 6 years.  It wasn’t the easiest 6 years because of the crap that was thrown at us but we were easy.  Our situation and circumstances tested the relationship.  Although I continued to fight, he had given up when the light at the end of our tunnel was so close, you could basically taste it.  I found this out on Christmas Eve, however he already had 6 months of moving on (WITH SOMEONE ELSE-7 years younger than him) before telling me a day before I was supposed to fly to see him.

I find myself alone for the first time yet surrounded by family.  I was a girlfriend, partner, wife and best friend, I don’t know how to be anything else anymore.  This is when I realized that I don’t know the first time about who I am without those labels.

This year I am determined to better myself and figure out as much as possible about myself.

I showered after my 30 minute run/jog/walk workout last night and realized that it was definitely time to shave my legs, like on a regular basis.  I remember reading or watching a TV show and the main character went to bed in a full faced make up because you never know what could happen in the middle of the night and/or who you could meet!  I felt that way in the shower.  I needed to stay groomed because you never know who you will meet and how hot and heavy it could get at a moments notice.  It’s something that I didn’t really have to do because when you are in a serious relationship it’s not a demand, you don’t have to prove anything to anyone.

I decided to shave my legs, exfoliate my skin and used my clarisonic to detox my face of impurities.  I haven’t done a full showering program in years!  It felt luxurious but what really hit me was after the shower.  I decided to use the “sexy” body lotion to moisturize my skin.  I freaked out for a moment-is this a thing that single ladies do?  I get that it makes you feel special but it’s exhausting.  I really hope that I don’t have to do this type of shower EVERY single day.